Toggle Header

I’m Just Going to Write VI

WARNING: The following may not be appropriate for readers under 18. Please leave this page if you are under 18.

Calvin sits in front of the TV flipping channels. He’s aroused. But his fist then his hand massaging his left thigh helps to relieve some of the tension. She’s sent him another nude photo. It came in the same time as the text from Larissa.

Starting a convent. I only have a few more days to sow my wild oats.

He has practically begged to see her. She’s used every excuse to avoid seeing him in person, but she’s quick to text back. And a huge–borderline sadist–flirt. She knows what a tease she’s being.

Meanwhile, he has a platter of beautiful low-substance women to choose from. Mary is the most aggressive. Nudes on the daily, nearly.

He turns off the TV, goes to his prayer mat. “God, this is the kind of woman I want to marry. Save me from this meaningless existence.” He’s been celibate for three weeks now. Avoiding his usual routes. Which is how he ran into Larissa at the grocery store. If he could just get her to let him take her out, she would see that they would be perfect together.

The conversation they had the night they met changed his life. He is now truly curious about his ancestral lineage, and reading his Bible on the daily. But she has no idea. He wants to show her how much she’s impacted him.

Why haven’t you blocked Mary? he hears in his Spirit. He grabs his phone from the floor near the mat, going through her pics. A total of ten. She’s a talented photographer. These photos could fetch real money if she wanted.

You should take photography seriously, he starts to text her, but don’t text me again.

Instead of sending, he deletes it. Scrolls through the photos again. Plump breasts. Thick hips. The golden crux. He zooms in on her feminine toffee. Grits his teeth. She’d make millions as a porn star. He blocks her first. Then deletes the images. 

“Ok God. I’m ready. I’ll do better.” He looks up a nearby church. Finds an Ethiopian Orthodox temple nearby. This will work.

For more of these writings in your inbox, subscribe here

For the full series, go here.

About Lolade

Lolade is a Gates Cambridge Scholar, starting her PhD in Sociology with the 2019 class. She recently graduated with her MA in African Studies [Sociology discipline] from Yale University where she researched ethnic identity formation among Nigerian immigrants in New York, Tokyo and Mumbai. She is the author of 'Market of Dreams' a radical poetry collection about love and freedom. She obsesses over indigenous textiles, cultural preservation and innovation, and intimately connecting the African Diaspora.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.