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Self Hatred

Self hatred is a drug

That if taken

Will kill you

Self hatred is a drug

That if taken

Will kill you

Self hatred is a drug

That if taken

Will kill you

Will kill you

Will kill you

Self hatred is a need

To hurt myself

Self hatred is a need

To hurt yourself

Self hatred is my need

To hurt yourself, myself

You are myself

And I hate you

I want to harm you, self hatred

You just like me, self hatred

And I need to kill you, self hatred

Self hatred is a drug

That makes sisters

Kill sisters

Self hatred is a drug

That makes brothers

Kill sisters

Self hatred is a drug

That makes brothers kill brothers

Kill brothers

Kill brothers

Self hatred is a drug

That makes mommies

Kill babies

Self hatred is a drug

That makes daddies

Beat babies

Self hatred is a drug

That makes Black kill Black

Black kill Black

Black kill Black

Self hatred is the drug

That lets others

Enslave us

Self hatred is the drug

That lets others

Erase us

Self hatred is the drug

That makes me

Want to hurt you

You want to hurt me

Us want to hurt we

Self hatred is a drug

That makes the mirror

My enemy

Self hatred is the drug

That makes me hate what God made me

Self hatred is a drug

That makes me want to change me

Me want to change me

Me want to change me

Self hatred is a drug

That makes me my worst enemy

You my worst enemy

Makes me believe

We

Are ugly

Self hatred

Self hatred is the reason

We are dying of a cancer

It is the reason

For drive by shootings

Genocides

Gun killings

Self-poisons

Chemical dyes and skin bleaches

Interracial ties and white jesus

When I see you I see what I see in the mirror

Black skin, black hair, black eyes

That look into my eyes

And wish they were white eyes

When I see you I see what I see in the mirror

Thick lips, round hips, jawbones, cheek bones

Big teeth, round noses, thick legs

I suppose it’s me that I see

Every time I see you in the street

I don’t love myself

So I can’t love you

You see I hate myself

So I have to hate you

Been taught that what’s me

Is beneath

What’s me is uncouth

What’s me is a lie

They are the truth

What’s me is darkness

Savagery and filth

What’s me deserves to die

What’s me is not to live

In their world

But if I wake in the morning

And I like what I see

And I pray to a God

That looks just like me

And I see you as my sister

An extension of me

And I see you as my brother

You are my family

Then I can never imagine

Doing harm to you

I could never imagine just to take from you

I could never imagine

Your blood on my hands

I could never imagine

Your loss as my chance

To win status

I could never imagine

Envy over yours

I could never imagine bleeding these wars

My sister my brother my father my child

My mother my neighbor I need you alive

My eye, my hand, my feet, my rib

My blood my tears my will to live

One body, one being

You are me

And I am you

And I am no longer

Self hating.